The perks of networking, part 2

March 14, 2013

I’ve been kind of short on words lately. I’m in a writing rut, I guess. Anyway, I was reading through a few older pins on my Pinterest boards the other day and was grateful for this reminder about networking, so I thought I’d share it.

“Someone you haven’t even met yet is wondering what it’d be like to know someone like you.”

You’re looking for the people that are looking for you.
They are out there, you just have to find them.
There are likeminded people everywhere.
You never know who you are going to meet.
You never know where you are going to meet them.
You never know where, or to what, meeting them could lead.

Apply it to your business, of any kind. Apply to your personal life, in any way.

Good food for thought. And such a happy thought at that, yeah?

Happy happy to you.

Hugs,
AS

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Part 1: The perks of networking: You can’t make this stuff up Such a crazy story, eh?

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Quotes and planting seeds and the little things

March 7, 2013

Earlier this week I grabbed one of my old journals and started flipping through it. They were entries from a year ago, and besides reading a ton of unecessary and ridiculous complaints about the size of my 7 month-pregnant belly and swollen tree trunk ankles, I ran into these two quotes I had recorded:

“In network marketing insterad of earning income, you build an asset – your business – and the asset generates income.” – Robert Kiyosaki in Business of the 21st Century

“The ongoing myth is that brands get built by advertising. Actually, brands get reinforced by advertising but they get built by grassroots word-of-mouth.” – Marc Andressen in a Fast Company magazine article

The first one is a great quote, and one that can apply to many types of businesses. But that’s not what I wanted to discuss.

What I wanted to discuss was the quote from Marc and word of mouth. I send a weekly email to my entire Vemma team, and last week I talked about this very thing. It seems to be popping up everywhere I look lately.

Word of mouth.
Networking.
The little things.
One person at a time.

Businesses are built on word of mouth. Fortunes are built on word of mouth. Empires. Futures!

And you know what one person telling one person telling one person telling one person is? It’s a reminder that it’s the little things that matter. The little things, done over and over again, added up, over time, that define the difference between the successful and the unsuccessful.

They say it’s the little things that make the difference. That’s true in Vemma, as it is with most things in life and business.

Everything is a choice. All of those choices, those seemingly inconsequential choices, are important.

Reading that quote just got me thinking about it again. We shouldn’t forget how important those choices are.

Is that one phone call we are making every day adding up? YES.
Are those 10 pages of a good book we’re reading every day making a difference? YES.
Are those 2 follow ups we are making every day worth it? YES YES and YES.

The results will come if you do the work. Even if the work doesn’t seem to be immediately creating results. The results are there! They are just tiny little seeds, sprouting roots and a foundation that is going stronger by the day. And it’s not until that now complex and impressive structure breaks through the ground that you have your proof that something was even happening underneath that dirt. It was happening. It. Was. Happening. It IS happening.

Word of mouth is a bag of seeds. One person telling another is one seed being planted. That seed might never bloom. It might start to grow and then become weak and die for reasons unknown. It might sit dormant for days, months, even years before doing anything. Or, that seed might grow into the very vine you needed to climb to your next step in life.

One person telling another is one seed being planted.

Word of mouth.
Networking.
The little things.
One person at a time.

What are you telling? What story? And who are you telling it to? That’s a question only you can answer. Your story. Your business. Your cause.

Sharing your story with one person at a time is a little thing. On it’s own, it’s not much. But little things done consistently over time, again and again and again, can add up to very big things indeed.

Don’t forget about word of mouth. It’s free. And it’s easy to do.

And I guess that’s all I wanted to say about that. :)

Make it a great one, all!
AS

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Dear Babygirl #16: Soaking it up

February 28, 2013

Dear Babygirl,

You are nine and a half months old now and my oh my, you are learning so much.

It’s astonishing to watch. Every parent says this, of course. The whole “They change every day!” mantra. And I knew it would happen, but I didn’t expect it to be so.darn.cool. to experience. As with most things in life, it’s all in the little things. The tiny everyday things that one day you don’t have a clue how to master and the next day you are doing with a casualness that speaks, “What? It’s no big deal, Mom.”

Two weeks ago you realized you could hold your own bottle, and became quite content simply feeding yourself.

Last week you started singing.

Last weekend you started pointing at things you wanted, thrusting your entire arm and hand straight out towards whatever it was you wanted to discuss with grunts.

Monday you picked up one of those touch ‘n feel board books and flipped through the pages all by yourself.
Tuesday you knew exactly where the fuzzy parts were on each page.

Wednesday you started saying “duh duh duh” when the dog walked into the room.

Thursday you pushed yourself up from your belly into a seated position in your crib. The first time you’ve ever been able to do that by yourself.

How are you learning so much so fast? Even the most veracious adult learner wouldn’t be able to keep up with your pace.

It’s interesting to think about how learning is engrained in you. Physically, biologically, you are programmed to keep moving forward. To continually master new things.

It’s sad to think about how most adults have lost that. At some point they took a pit stop between childville and adulttown, temporarily lost their wonder and determination to keep moving forward, and forgot to ever put that train of learning back on its tracks. It was engrained in them at some point, too, but they grew, developed the ability to make their own decision, and decided to stop.

I hope that never happens to you. I hope you keep your wonder and determination to learn new things, even when those new things might not seem as important as, say, the ability to feed yourself or walk upright.

A friend of mine once called me a human sponge for my ridiculous habit of soaking in random tidbits of new information and experiences everywhere I go. It’s just how I am, I guess. But I am aware of what a conscious decision it is. It was. To be this way. To be the geek that reads the back of the menu at a new restaurant so on the way out the door, when everyone is talking about how great the fish sandwich was, I can regale them with the story of the huge piece of driftwood in the front entry and how that was the first piece of this entire building and the owner, Jim, found it one day when he was praying about what do to with his life and isn’t it so interesting how a fabulous new restaurant can be inspired by a piece of wood? Cool huh, guys?

Guys? … Hello?

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That sponginess transfers into my reading, too. I’m just as interested in reading the latest bestselling novel as I am a book about a combat zone hospital or a memoir of one of the greatest golf coaches ever or a non-fiction e-book about minimalism.

I can’t wait to keep dripping drops of learning inspiration on you from my bucket of unending curiosity. Some days, some years, I’m sure I’ll miss hitting you with them. Or they will land in a pool that has already deemed itself too full. But I’ll keep dripping, and I can’t wait to see what you get excited to learn about.

I can’t wait to learn from you.

I can’t wait to be regaled with a random story of a random piece of driftwood in a random Intracoastal Waterway dive restaurant that you were thrilled to be able to share with me.

And I can’t wait to learn with you. Always with you.

Keep soaking it in, Babygirl. Keep soaking it all in.

All my love,
Mama

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For more in the Dear Babygirl series: Letters to my Daughter

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Introducing the Virtual Book Club! Bloom, by Kelle Hampton

February 21, 2013

I am thrilled to announce a new feature here on AS.com – the Virtual Book Club.

Wohoo!

Last summer I had the pleasure of getting to know one of my neighbors; the lovely Alison Cady. We had never really sat down and talked before. There was a block party, adult beverages were involved, we realized we both love books, and next thing we knew we were geeky out on authors and “You have to read…!” proclamations and dreams of a “serious” book club. It was great.

And then Alison and her husband up and moved across the country. The buttheads. Something about an amazing job and a stunning city and close family? Harumph.

Anyway, being the book lovers that we are, we decided to read and discuss a few books from afar. Apart. Yet together! And the first book we picked was a phenomenal one.

But before I get to the book, I want to formally introduce you to Alison.

17 lovely readers of mine? This is Alison.
Alison? Please say hello to my 17 lovely readers.

In her own words: “I spend my days chasing my ever inquisitive 13 month old daughter and my evenings working as a contract marketer for various companies helping them to expand their online presence. I reside in Seattle and am passionate about reading, running, my family and friends, red wine and chocolate!”

Thanks for being here, Alison!

Without further ado, here are our thoughts on Bloom.


Bloom: Finding Beauty in the Unexpected
Kelle Hampton

Alison Cady (AC): I came across Kelle’s blog about 6 months ago and fell in love.  I would read and read post after post and feel inspired, empowered and so full of love.  I went all the way back to the beginning and what I found (and loved) is that her writing has never changed.  Before she became famous she was still enthralled with being a mother and has always had a unicorn and rainbow attitude. 

Annie Sorensen (AS): I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I *totally* know what you mean when you say you fell in love with Kelle’s writing. There’s just something about her words. The way they are strung together – there is something more behind hers. The emotion, the strength, the love all literally leap off the computer screen and wrap their arms around my neck. I read many other blogs, at least half a dozen on a daily basis, but none make me feel what Enjoying the Small Things does. I savor new posts. I see one pop up and I immediately close my computer. I might go put on that pair of socks I’ve been meaning to for over an hour because my feet are cold, warm up my coffee, adjust the pillow on my chair, take a breath, and relax. I prepare to read them, to savor them, to soak them in. Because I feel like that’s what they deserve. Preparation.
 
AC: I couldn’t wait to start reading Bloom.  I wanted to learn more about this woman who could be so vulnerable in her writing, but still be so authentic and true to herself.  The first chapter I read slowly and meticulously like I was afraid I would miss out on something if I read too fast.  At first I was a bit annoyed with how quickly she would jump from one thing to another.  She would be right in the middle of one story, and would fan back to something else to give the first story more validity and I felt like the flow was a bit off.  But after that first chapter I didn’t notice it as much and I feel like the book continued on a chronological path. 

AS: Interesting, I didn’t notice the flow or jumping of topics at all! I read the first few chapters pleasantly surprised that Kelle was going into detail about her childhood and early adulthood. I hadn’t expected that. I was thrilled about the idea of reading the book, even when I thought it was simply an extended version of her last couple years with Nella and her family. The inclusion of her background was a nice addition to the story, and gave more weight to why she is the love-filled, emotional person she is today. I felt like after reading about her past, I understood more of what she was describing about her present.
 
AC: I thoroughly enjoyed this book and would recommend it to any mother.  The way she puts herself out there and shares every emotion is refreshing and nice to hear as a new mom.  I love the way she loves her children with such ferocity – it made me want to be a better mom.  I was very impressed with her writing.  I’ve read memoirs before from ‘writers’ who have no business writing a book, but I really enjoyed her style and think that is one of the best attributes of the book.   I just loved how relatable she made herself, she put it all out there – the good, the bad and the ugly – and it helped me to connect with her and really absorb into her story.  

AS: Recommend it to any mother. For sure. The honesty and the putting it all out there. Yes and yes. Couldn’t agree more! I have also read other memoirs, many by moms, who make their lives sound like nothing but roses and lollipops. You know what, who wants to be that perfect? What about embracing who we are and loving ourselves and our lives for the very fact that they are NOT perfect? I kind of like my imperfections, thank you very much. I would totally agree that that part of the way Kelle writes, both in the book and on the blog, are endearing. I found myself shaking my head in agreement several times to her thoughts. Yes, we aren’t perfect, and yes, we love our kids ferociously, and yes, we are awesome anyway! It’s almost like she has a confidence that very few women writers have that says, This is who I am! And I am confident in saying that I’m not always 100% sure of who I am or how I mother but you know what, I’m okay with that.

AC: One thing I would have liked to see more of was the relationship between her and Brett.  As a new parent myself, one of the more challenging aspects was adjusting our marriage to include a new person into our normal team of two.  We had to figure out our new roles and work together more than ever.  I would have liked to hear more about their challenges, especially with a special needs child, how it affected their marriage and how they worked through it.

AS: I would have loved to see more of the development of their relationship, too. She mentioned a couple times how “she wasn’t sure” what Brett was thinking right after Nella’s birth and I wondered to myself, you didn’t? Didn’t you talk about it? That seemed odd to me. Maybe they talked more about it but Kelle didn’t share the private details, or maybe that’s how they work things out, kind of within themselves. I think it would have been incredibly helpful to other mothers to not only talk about the spousal relationship after Lainey, their first child together, was born, but after Nella, too. I would have liked to see more about what she thinks of their future. What they have planned and what she’s excited about and what they’re worried about and everything. I felt like the story ended abruptly. Kind of like, well my manuscript is due tomorrow and I’ve written about my life up until today, so I better stop! Perhaps this leaves her open to another memoir, we’ll see. :) 

AC: Overall I give this book a 4 out of 5 stars.  It is a quick and emotional read and when it ended I found myself sad and wanted more.  Luckily I can still follow her through her blog!

AS: I would say 4.5 out of 5 stars. As much as I nitpick, man, did I love this book. Just like her blog, I savored it. I didn’t just grab the book when I had thirty seconds to read a page or two. I carved out quiet time with a hot drink and a warm blanket to soak in her words. Thinking about reading it makes me smile. I rarely read books for a second time, but this one might just be opened again.

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See? That was fun.

You can find Alison on Twitter. Please stop by and say hello.

I hope you liked the format of our review, and our thoughts on Bloom. We thought this would be a convenient, interesting, and unique way for two women in opposite parts of the country to share in the experience of absorbing the same book at the same time. We hope to have more virtual book club reviews for you in the near future. Up next on our docket: Gone Girl, by Gillian Flynn. (Insert ohh’s and ahh’s here.) We would be thrilled to have you join us!

So, my dear readers, what’d you think? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

In book geekery,
AS (and AC!)

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The day I was given Rich Dad Poor Dad

February 7, 2013

The lounge always smelled kinda funny. It wasn’t rank or mildewy, it just filled your nose with the smell of linoleum tile and industrial cleaner upon entering, and bothered you just enough to notice but not enough to keep you out. Very few students ever used the lounge, which was in the basement, directly below the cavernous entry and main foyer of the dorm, and I was never really sure why. It was cool and quiet and close to the vending machines. Two curved walls were lined with red vinyl booths in the center of the room and the floor was covered in giant black and white tiles. Walking down the wide staircase from the lobby you would wind up in the doorway of the room, where the vending machines were on the left wall and the door to the hallway leading towards the coin laundry was back to the right.

I can’t recall what I was doing there that evening. It was sometime during the second semester of my freshman year, so prepping for a mid-term or even a final could have been my main concern. Perhaps I was working on a paper or studying for a quiz, or maybe I just wanted to get away and the quiet spot was appealing. For whatever reason I was there, he was there, too.

He was a friend of my roommate and someone I considered a buddy. He, the only son of a successful trial lawyer, and me, very much my father’s daughter, were having a lovingly geeky conversation about Roth IRA’s. I called my dad shortly thereafter, in fact, and before I knew it I had an account that I proudly and committedly contributed to throughout my twenties.

I had never had conversations like that before. We talked about big things that night. Money and planning and dreams and goals. I was a late teen college student, child of the middle class, and newly pledged sorority girl. I graduated from Valley High School; a Valley girl, literally. I was – at the time – an overachieving, naive pre-dentistry major.

I had a solid, loving, and splendidly normal upbringing. Comfortably middle class but with conservative, hardworking parents who prided themselves as masters of cash-flow; low monthly cash-flow out results in a higher disposable income, they taught me. The lifestyle they built came complete with a membership to the country club, a reliable used car at sixteen, and occasional, impactful mini lessons on money.

It was those lessons, engrained into my subconscious from childhood, coupled with a strong Type A, eldest-child desire to learn and know everything, that set me up that night.

When the book was handed over there wasn’t much fanfare.

Have you read this? It’s kinda good.
Nope. Huh, (reading the back cover) it sounds cool.
It’s yours. You’re welcome to borrow it.
Oh ok. Thanks.

And that was it.

I borrowed the book. I read it.

And after closing the cover I knew something had shifted.

Instead of working for money, have money work for you.

It came through loud and clear, that message, and I never forgot it.

I was hooked. Hooked on thinking differently, hooked on the concept of money working in my favor, and hooked on the possibilities. I was suddenly a student of learning to such a degree that I would forever read more ferociously, live with more curiosity, and be committed to creating time and financial freedom in my life after reading it.

But I didn’t know that then. The evening had grown late and the bright red booths were all but empty. Minimal studying was accomplished. Inconsequential chatter amongst two young college students breezily took its place. The borrowed book had been tucked into my backpack and temporarily forgotten. I didn’t know then that, once read, it would never be forgotten again.

Oh how that book worked me. But it did start it all. It really did.

It started my shift in mindset.
It started my personal development journey.
It started my quest for financial freedom.
It started my determined road to success and residual income and defining my own life.

If I had known what trouble it would cause six years later, I’m not sure I ever would have had the guts to open it.

…

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2012: My Year in Books (Plus, Fall/Winter Mini Book Reviews!)

January 31, 2013

2012! Phew. It was a fun year in books.

There are 52 books listed on my 2012 reading list.
44 of those I read cover to cover, 8 of them I just skimmed.
51 of those were fully published books, only 1 was a self-published ebook.
I read the most in January – 9 books – and the least in November – 0. (I was busy writing!)

A few favorite, couldn’t-get-enough-of-’em, loved-them-to-pieces highlights:

Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns), by Mindy Kaling
A laugh outloud – repeatedly – memoir from the dry humored Kelly Kapoor from The Office. I read it while relaxing last summer at the lake. A perfect “beach read.” You know when you read a memoir of someone you’re barely familiar with and then after reading it, you want to know everything about them and be their new best friend? Yeah. That.

 

 

I Feel Bad About My Neck: And Other Thoughts On Being a Woman, by Nora Ephron
Damn, I wish I could write like Nora. (But doesn’t everybody?) Another wish: that I was more familiar with her work when she was still alive. Her writing is so powerful in its simplicity. Like a river that appears calm and slow on the surface, but is capable of ripping out trees and flipping boulders; there is so much more to her understated writing than you think upon first glance. Strong undercurrents of meaning and emotion and awareness.

 

 

Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail, by Cheryl Strayed
This was the first book I read after Babygirl was born, and I absorbed it like a sponge. Cheryl’s story about her adventure was deeper than I expected, and I pulled every emotional connection I could from it during that hormone-filled, introspective time in my life.

 

 

 

The American Heiress: A Novel, by Daisy Goodwin
My favorite novel of the year. The quotes on the cover mention Downton Abbey, that if you love that show you’ll love this book. I have never seen it, but good gracious maybe I should. It was comfortable to read yet full of imagery and emotion that plunked you right down into the time period. Such fun.

 

 

 

The $100 Startup: Reinvent the Way You Make a Living, Do What You Love, and Create a New Future, by Chris Guillebeau
Chris’s second book didn’t disappoint. Motivating. Instructive. Clear. Worthwhile. Inspiring.

 

 

 

The Duck Commander Family: How Faith, Family, and Ducks Built a Dynasty, by Willie Robertson Korie Robertson
I stumbled upon this book while wandering through Barnes & Noble one weekend and actually smiled at the realization that it existed. We love the show. We laugh outloud at the show. We watch reruns of the show and laugh outloud again in the same places we laughed outloud the first time. And they have a book? I MUST READ IT. The pictures of the family Before Beards are practically worth the price of the book on their own. Add in the fascinating background of this unique, successful family and you have one darn-good entertaining read.

 

Bloom: Finding Beauty in the Unexpected: A Memoir, by Kelle Hampton
Another thought-provoker. Kelle is one of my favorite favoritest bloggers, and also an inspiration writing-wise. Her writing is, is, is…beautiful. (She would have been able to describe it with a better word than that. And with a simile to boot.) The quality of the blog posts she cranks out a couple times a week – writing about her life and her family and her home – never cease to amaze me. I was excited about this one, and it didn’t disappoint. The book extends on the topics she covers on her blog. Specifically, her childhood and journey surrounding the surprise diagnosis of her second daughter with Down Syndrome. It was a lovely read. I rarely read books twice, but this one I have marked for just that. It was contemplative and emotional and full of thoughts on life and motherhood that I want to invite back into my brain to rattle around for a while longer.

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That list of highlights leans much more towards girly than my reading has in years past. Much more personal. In fact, my entire reading list from 2012 trends that direction. Compared to 2011 and 2010, it’s full of more fiction than non-fiction. But I guess that makes sense? Our reading tends to reflect what we are thinking about and who we want to be and what we are relating to and this year, the year I became a mama, maybe it’s strong women that really attracted me. Strong women that are also happily considered a little…loopy. Loopy and weird and totally, completely lovely.

I’ll take it.

Fall/Winter 2012 Mini Book Reviews

For my birthday last year I wrote 31 mini book reviews in celebration of my 31 years. In September I wrote a mini review for every book I read in June, July, and August. So, in order to wrap up my 2012 reading with a tidy little bow, here are mini book reviews for everything I read in September, October, November, and December. A sentence or two each, because it’s more fun that way.

Here we go!

The American Heiress: A Novel, by Daisy Goodwin
Loved. See above.

Three Weeks with My Brother, by Nicholas Sparks, Micah Sparks
The behind-the-scenes life story of one of the world’s bestselling novelists? Yes, please.

The Big Miss: My Years Coaching Tiger Woods, by Hank Haney
Way too technical for this I-only-golfed-in-high-school girl, but the peek behind the curtain provided by one of the few people in the world to ever get close-ish to TW was worth the read.

The Litigators: A Novel, by John Grisham
I stopped reading Grisham several novels ago, but I broke the streak with this one. Worth it. Nothing will ever be as wonderful as his first – A Time To Kill – but this one came close.

The Business of the 21st Century, by Robert Kiyosaki
A rare second reading for me. I challenged my Vemma team to read it, and I wasn’t about to not join them. Worthwhile. Eye opening. Reassuring. Exciting. (And short!)

The Duck Commander Family: How Faith, Family, and Ducks Built a Dynasty, by Willie Robertson, Korie Robertson
Loved. See above.

London Is the Best City in America, by Laura Dave
Ehh. I randomly ran into this novel deep into an Amazon search one evening. It was enjoyable and easy to read with a strong moral resonating throughout, but I didn’t love the quality of the writing.

Sign With Your Baby: How to Communicate With Infants Before They Can Speak, by Joseph Garcia
Informative! A super easy, useful mommy-read.

Bloom: Finding Beauty in the Unexpected: A Memoir, by Kelle Hampton
Loved. See above.

Black and Blue: A Novel, by Anna Quindlen
Oh my. I was mesmerized by this book. After I read Room a couple years ago, I couldn’t stop thinking about it for days, weeks, after turning the final page. This book was the same way. And damn, Quindlen is such a stunning writer.

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Phew! Good stuff.

I have big writing goals for 2013, so if I’m able to simply keep my reading at the same level as 2012, I’ll consider it good. So, 52 books. Average of one every week. Let’s do this!

(I’m 5 books in so far. Look at me go!)

What reads did you love in 2012? What’re you reading now? How many books will you read this year?

In book geekery,
AS

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20 Ways to Be a More Productive Mommy

January 24, 2013

20130124-155735.jpg  Let’s be honest, there is always room for improvement in the balance between the raising babies you and the successful businessperson you. At least, I know there always is for me.

That being said, I’ve found several small things that make a huge difference in me feeling okay about the quality time I’m spending with my daughter and the productivity I’m able to achieve with my work.

As many of you know, I work from home. I worked from home even before Babygirl arrived, building my Vemma business, writing, and helping manage our rental properties. After she was born, I spent a month or so under the covers, getting used to the way the phrase “I’m a Mom” sounded as it rang newly in my ears. But around the 4th of July, I started feeling the itch to get working again. The pull to be productive. The self judgement to get something done (besides raising my child, of course). Since then, I’ve gotten better and better at doing just that.

Assumed disclaimer – I am no expert, and I’m not a seasoned Mommy, but this is what has helped me over the past eight and a half months, and maybe it can help you too. Please share any tips you have!

1. Close the laptop lid Seriously, if I leave it up, I am ten times more likely to glance at it, see an email, check a blog, run through the list of the people I’m supposed to call and before I know it I’ve missed the cute smile she makes after knocking over her blocks.

2. Teux Deux iPhone app Can I marry an iPhone app? Because if I could, I’d totally marry this one. Those lists that run through your head at all hours of the day? That you worry about forgetting? Record them in 3 seconds in your app and fuhgettaboutit.

3. Teux Duex iPhone app, part 2 Yeah, pick it back up the moment your feet hit the main floor after you lay the kiddo down for naptime, and you’re immediately launching into a productive task. No longer will fluffy tasks like opening the mail or picking up random dog toys eat into your perfectly quiet 90 minutes.

4. Jump into the day My daughter is blissfully happy first thing in the morning. Within five minutes of waking she’s sitting in the living room watching cartoons with a couple toys, totally entertaining herself. Even though I’m foggyheaded and would much rather lay on the floor with her and slowly wake up, I try to force myself into action. If I do it right, I can scan and clear out almost all of my email, empty the dishwasher, throw in a load of laundry, and review my to do list before I have even been awake for half an hour. And then I lay down on the floor with her.

5. Editorial calendar The Teux Deux app is for the small stuff. The calendar is for the big projects. Before, I would get sucked into the little day-to-day items I had to get done. Now, when she’s sleeping and I have 20 minutes left after accomplishing daily tasks on my list, I can efficiently make progress on a bigger project because I know exactly which one I should be working on. For me, I schedule my writing assignments, penciling them in on the day they’re due, but the system could work for anything.

6. Check off the big projects I check off a writing project on the calendar when it’s complete. I am motivated so much by that stupid checkmark, to the point that I will push to get one more word written during the minute that she’s waking up from her nap, or force myself to work twenty productive minutes before sitting down with Hubz when she goes to bed. And I’m a visual person, so this calendar is one of those large-squared, paper bohemeth’s that hangs on the wall in my office.

7. Keep social media in check TMI warning: I allow myself to cruise Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram while I’m in the bathroom. That’s it.

8. Take advantage of meal times I save most dishes and dinner prep for when she’s in her highchair, happily pawing away at a few Super Puffs. Why tinker around in the kitchen during the times she is awake and wants to play? It’s rare that I can’t get everything I want to get done in the kitchen before she’s done eating.

9. When worse comes to worse, take her with you When she was little and I had a longer than usual to do list, I’d strap her into the Bjorn and take her with me. We would talk while folding laundry and read emails out loud. Beats leaving her to play by herself in the living room every time.

10. Exercise Not counting the 22 trips up and down the stairs, the only exercise I get on an average day is a couple-mile walk around our neighborhood. But I need that walk. It makes me happier, calmer, and better focused. On my work and my daughter.

11. Turn off the tv I know I know, this is what everybody says. But I still watch tv! Only it’s intentional tv. If punkin goes to bed at 7pm, I can get a solid hour of work done, spend two hours with Hubz watching a couple shows, and still be in bed at the lovely hour of 10pm. Score. If I leave it on for a couple hours in the morning, or flip it on during that mid-afternoon slump, I waste way more time than I realize. Plus, then my daughter ends up with way more screen time than I’m comfortable with.

12. Make time to read It’s a must for me. If I don’t make time – even 10 to 15 minutes a day – to read, it’s similar to exercise; I’m not as relaxed nor happy. You can’t be productive when you’re not happy. (Audio books while in the car help with this! But a physical book and a hot cup of coffee, even for just a few minutes, has ten times the relaxation power.)

13. Smile a lot You’d be surprised how a sigh and a big smile – especially when directed towards your child – can make you feel like your to do list is managable, and provide you the confidence to jump right in and prove it. And you know what? It won’t kill you to smile more. I promise.

14. Organize When the blankets and the rattles and the stuffed animals all have a specific home, when the bank statements and journals and even emails have their own spots to settle in, time isn’t wasted wallowing in indecision over where to put them, or frustration over your messy spaces.

15. A helpful, loving spouse Goes without saying, but I said it anyway. Work together. It’s necessary.

16. Know where you’re going Goals. Set them. Otherwise your work will be aimless, and there’s no better way to get lost and feel unproductive and unworthy than to not have an idea of the point or purpose for your work. Also, there’s no other way to feel guiltier about working when you could/should be spending time with your child, than if you don’t know why you’re really doing it.

17. Don’t sweat the small stuff They named a book after that phrase because it’s true. If I let the minor meltdowns or the blown-out diaper or the attention-demanding dog or the sore back get me down, that’s not going to be good for anyone, and can only result in wasted time.

18. Get on the floor The times I’m happiest with my daughter? When I feel like we’re connecting the most? When I’m laying on her blanket or sitting next to her, right at her level. Even if I just have five minutes, it makes those 300 short seconds seem incredibly worthwhile.

19. Keep the cell phone on the main floor One of my personal rules. Your home may vary, obviously. I’m not perfect at following this rule, but I never regret ignoring the pull to take it upstairs with me, as what follows, whether it’s playing or nursing or reading or folding her laundry, is something we do together, no distractions.

20. Be both flexible and scheduled We wake up around the same time, play around the same time, nap around the same time, run errands around the same time. This helps tremendously with the wallowing, as I usually know what I’m going to do next. But that doesn’t mean I won’t push to make three extra phone calls during the 30 minute nap extension she seems to be enjoying this afternoon or keep the car running in the driveway to respond to a couple emails when she unexpectedly falls asleep on the way home from the grocery store. Scheduled…yet flexible!

This list could go on forever, and applies to my situation as a mommy of a youngin who works flexibly from home. Would love to hear your additions to the list!

Hugs,
AS

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