A 9th letter to my unborn daughter

April 17, 2012

Dear Babygirl,

I was talking to one of your grandmas yesterday and, without really thinking, mentioned how you have blonde hair and blue eyes. I don’t know this, of course, but it just kind of makes sense. Your Daddy and I are both blonde and blue, why wouldn’t you be?

Your grandma politely reminded me that both of your parents (me and Daddy) have one parent (your grandmas and grandpas) with dark hair and dark eyes. We both ended up with the lighter hair and lighter eyes, but those recessive genes, they’re in there somewhere.

What if you popped out with brown eyes and brown hair?
Or green eyes and black hair?
Or purple eyes and pink hair!

Just kidding about that last one.

I think it’s a natural inclination for parents, especially first time parents, to think of the traits of their future children as Either/Or.

Will you have curly hair like your mama or straight hair like your Daddy?
Will you love math like your mama or like to sing like your Daddy?

Either. Or.

What new parents forget – most definitely me and your Daddy – is the opposite of Either/Or: Other.

Will you love to read like Mama, love to watch movies like Daddy, or will you hate both and prefer to listen to music while flipping through a comic book?

Will you have bright, royal blue eyes like Daddy, lighter, silvery blue eyes like Mama, or your own shade of green or brown or hazel?

It’s the Other that I can’t wait for, Babygirl. The unknown. The pieces of your personality and appearance and overall You-ness that aren’t anything like what we expected.

The surprises and the we-would-have-never-in-a-million-years-been-able-to-imagine.

Surprise us, girlfriend. We can’t wait.

And by the way, you are welcome to start surprising us any day now. Aaaaany day.

(How’s tomorrow work for you?)


For more in the Dear Babygirl series: Letters to my Unborn Daughter

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