Your kids.
Your spouse.
Your job.

No money.
Too much money.

Too much debt.
Too much success.
Too much failure.

Your age.
Your friends.
Your lack of friends.

Reasons. Excuses. They can only be one or the other. They can’t be both. How you categorize them is up to you, and is under no one else’s control but your own.

No one else’s control. But. Your. Own.

The kids are the kids, and they’re either your reason for doing something or your excuse for not.

Your job is your job. Will you make it your reason? Or your excuse?

You don’t have any money. Are you going to allow your finances to keep you from taking action, using it as an excuse? Or will it be the very reason you decide to take action today..this minute…this second?

Your situation is your situation, and it’s not going to change unless you decide to change it. In order to decide to change it, you have to decide on how to categorize it.

Your situation is your reason, or it’s your excuse. You pick.

I included this at the end of another post recently, but it warrants being included one more time:

Choose wisely!

You are one of my biggest reasons,
AS

—

I ran into this today:

Think about why? Well, alrighty then.

Why did I start writing?
- Because I realized it made me happy.
- Because I constantly had sentences and paragraphs and novels flowing through my head that I was tired of knowing were going to waste. Plus, the only way to sleep was to calm them down and the only way to calm them down was to write them down.
- Because I realized it made me happy.

Why did I start to sharing Vemma 5 years ago?
- Because of the stories I heard about how the product affected peoples lives.
- Because I trusted my friend that introduced it to me.
- Because I saw the potential in it being a financial vehicle to get me where I wanted to go.
- Because I wanted out of corporate.
- Because I thought it was neat that I could work towards my goal of time freedom, while also sharing something positive with others.
- Because I believed in it.

Why did I start investing in real estate 1 year ago?
- Because I have always been fascinated by it.
- Because I have always read about it.
- Because both Hubz and I knew what a powerful residual income stream it could produce.
- Because we wanted him out of corporate.

Why, almost a decade ago, did I start working towards complete time and financial freedom?
- Because I wanted to do what I wanted when I wanted.
- Because I knew I had a higher calling in life, and that I would know what it was when I found it, and that I wouldn’t find it if I was stuck working towards someone else’s agenda. (Still haven’t found it, by the way.)
- Because I just felt like I deserved it for some reason.
- Because I knew I wanted children someday, and the ultimate flexibility to raise and enjoy them.
- Because I wanted to help people.
- Because it felt right; way, way deep down.

Why…why?
Because it’s worth it.

And if it’s not worth it yet, it will be. Ten times over.

—

So, what about you – why did you start? Do you know? Do you remember?

Notice that I never mentioned above that I started something because I knew HOW to do it.

I knew why I wanted to do it. I knew what I wanted to accomplish in the end. I had no clue about the how part. Because you know what? That part didn’t matter.

Remind yourself why. Let it drive you. Because when you do? Those bumps in the road will look a lot less tricky to leap over, I promise.

And make that why a good one, by the way. Make it a doozy. Always remember:

—

Of all the tidbits of motivation and education and excitement I soaked up during our 5-day stint in Las Vegas earlier this month for the annual Vemma convention, this one takes the cake.

It’s a gal named Caroline. She’s not a part of Vemma. Her talk isn’t about Vemma. It’s not even about network marketing.

It’s about you.

And it’s awesome.

Caroline Casey was born legally blind, and is still only able to see large figures just a few feet away from her face. Her parents didn’t tell her that this wasn’t “normal” until she was 17. Seventeen!! Can you imagine?

Whether related to Vemma, another business, or anything else in your life, I thought you’d enjoy this 5 minute recap of her keynote speech:

Watching this might be the best 5 minutes you spend on yourself all week long.

“Letting go is not living to someone else’s opinion of you.

Do not let someone else define you. Let go. Be yourself.”

Enjoy!
AS

—

The speed bumps don’t matter.
The “how” doesn’t matter.
The haters don’t matter.

Let your belief, whatever it may be, guide you. Allow it to keep your mind focused and clear. Use it to keep the drama, the complicatedness, out of your mind and out of your life.

And out of your way.

Belief. Believe. What do you believe?

I believe that Hubz and I will be 100% financially free within the next 5 years. I picture the residual income we have coming in from multiple sources being larger than the expenses we have to live the lifestyle that we want. I picture both of us with time freedom to enjoy that lifestyle. I picture being able to educate, spend time with, travel with, and raise our children with complete flexibility, with every option available. I picture both of us working when we feel like it, on what we feel like, knowing that we’re only doing it for enjoyment as, after all, we won’t need to.

I picture it to the point that I know it’s true. I believe it is possible and I believe we will make it happen. It’s a future truth. That is my belief.

And you know what’s also true? Nothing else really does matter.

I heard an amazing quote yesterday while watching an interview with Oscar nominee Viola Davis. She said:

They say that the two most important days in a person’s life are the day you were born, and the day you discover why you were born.

How striking in its simplicity is that thought. Right?

I was born April 11th, 1981. It was a Saturday. The Masters golf tournament was broadcasted on the television in the hospital. Or so my Dad reminds me of every year. :)

I just typed out that I’m not yet sure if that second most important day in my life has happened for me, but the more I think about it, if I’m not sure it has, I’m sure it hasn’t.

Mull this one around for yourself today. See what it stirs up.

Want your business to grow? Want your LIFE to grow? Try these:

1. Burn the boats. If you land on an island and command your squad to start fighting the natives, what’s the surest way to gaurantee that you win? Burn the boats.

Put yourself into a situation where there’s no turning back. That way you HAVE to succeed. No matter what. Figure out what that means for you and your situation. If you allow yourself a fallback, what motivation do you truly have to push and be creative and make success happen? If you don’t have a fallback, if you’ve burned the boats, your mindset about being successful switches from something like “It would be nice if this works” to “It has to work, it will, it must.” Don’t underestimate how powerful that can be.

2. Ask a question. Looking for a new client for your consulting business? Send an email to ten of your closest, most professional friends and ask them if they know anyone who could use your assistance. Better yet, pick up the phone to call them instead. Not sure if you can figure out how to set-up your ebook shopping cart on your website? Post a tweet and ask if anyone else does. Looking for customers to buy your vitamin supplement? Ask, ask, ask. You won’t know until you do. And until you do, you’re just sitting around thinking about being in business. Which brings me to…

3. Know your exact intentions. Say you’re building a network marketing business. What’s your goal? I mean, your number-one, most preferred, perfect world intention? Probably looking for one or two other people to do exactly what you’re doing. Right? Although wonderful and necessary to business, your top intention probably isn’t to find a new customer who places a one-time order, or to find a distributor who is only halfway interested in sharing the product with one person over the course of the calendar year.

Love and support all your clients/customers/team members where they are, but be honest with yourself about what, or who you are really looking for. The clarity and confidence it will provide you in moving forward and simplifying your business will be worth it.

4. State your exact intentions. It’s not enough to simply know what they are. People in my Vemma business come to me all the time saying that they can’t find anyone open to building a business like they are. They’re struggling to duplicate themselves. “Are you actually ASKING people if they’re open to building a business like you are?” I inquire. The response is almost always, “Oh, hmm, not really.”

If you want it. Ask for it. Put it out there. Because how are you supposed to, say, attract and sign that perfect legal practice that wants the year-long social media consulting package that you’re offering if you don’t specifically ask them to hire you for a year-long social media consulting package? How are you supposed to nab that monthly column in the fashion magazine if you just send them your portfolio without a specific request for the monthly column job? The answer: you won’t. Practically never. People can’t read your mind, and rarely is what you exactly want handed to you without asking. Ask, and you’d be surprised how often you receive.

5. Know where you’re going. You have heard this one before. The late nights spent sending a few extra emails, picking up the phone to make those uncomfortable phone calls, rearranging your childcare to attend the networking event. None of that will happen, or you will quickly tire of it, if you don’t have an exact definition of where all of it will take you. And exact means EXACT.

“Any extra money I earn will help my family pay off our credit card debt.” Not clear enough.

“The first $500 I earn will go towards paying off my Banana Republic card. After that, all extra will go towards my $9500 in student loans.” Perfect.

Earning your first $50 might not seem like a big deal when compared with the looming destination of “paying off my credit card debt,” but when you measure it up against your first destination of a $500 store card balance, you can see the impact. Know exactly where you are going and the intention you have for what you’re doing, and make it easier on yourself to stay motivated and celebrate the impact of the little victories.

Right after Christmas, Hubz and I set a quirky little goal that required us to come up with $6000 in extra in just 4 months. We wrote our $6000 countdown on the white board in the office and every extra tidbit that we can nab – a freelance writing check here, selling a couple pieces of furniture from the dusty corner in the basement there, extra added to our savings after a pay period, etc – we record and subtract from the total. Now, we’re not rich by any means but we enjoy our lifestyle, and we have never appreciated an extra $50 or $100 more than we do right now. Before, it was just money. Now, it’s a specific step towards this destination. We didn’t change our spending habits nor our lifestyle, just defined our destination. It feels like that $6000 is appearing out of thin air. Really powerful.

6. Open your mind. Learn something new. The biggest step in personal development isn’t actually learning something new, it’s acknowledging the fact that you don’t know everything and that you COULD learn something new.

There are a few people in my life – whom I love dearly, don’t get me wrong – but who read a finance book or a business book or a nutrition book, close the back cover, and then declare, “It was an ok book, but I knew all of that stuff already.” You did? Really? You might as well have spent those last four hours watching Mad Men, because you surely didn’t get any use out of reading something when you weren’t in a mindset to learn.

Open your mind to the possibility that you can always – always always always – be better and stronger and smarter and kinder, and you will migrate towards ways to make that happen. Whether it be through reading a book or meeting a mentor or attending an event of likeminded people. Automatically.

—

Same thing, super-short version:

1. Make success a requirement, not an option.
2. Ask for what you want.
3. Be honest about your intentions.
4. Announce your intentions to others.
5. Know the exact path you are on.
6. Acknowledge what you don’t know, and how you can grow.

—

Practices. Practice them. They’re easy to do, they’re easy not to do. It’s your choice. Can’t wait to see you put them into action.

My two year anniversary of leaving my corporate job and jumping into a world of time freedom and self-employment was a few weeks ago, and I’ve found myself reflecting quite a bit since then on how my life has changed.

Two years. Has it really been that long?
Two years. Hasn’t it been more like ten?

It’s interesting what working for yourself can teach you. Interesting and fascinating and freaky and fun, all at the same time.

I’ve talked about this a bit before, but whenever I reflect on how working for myself has changed me, the answer that continually comes to mind is the act of reflection itself. I’m better at reflecting on my life and myself because of my experiences the past two years.

I’m quieter, literally and mentally.

My eyes spend more time open, really, really open, to what’s going on around me. To the feelings of those I’m currently sharing the room with to the actions of those I’m communicating with around the world.

I’m more thoughtful; have more patience.

I have a calm about myself that I didn’t know I could possess before.

There’s something about waking up in the morning and defining your day just about 100% in your own way that changes you. Reflection is a natural part of this way of life. It becomes more apparent what you are thinking, how you are feeling, what you are missing. But the part that changed isn’t that you suddenly start thinking or feeling or missing.

Being able to pay attention to all of that is what changes.

When things are up to me, that me is the one who has decide. In order for me to decide, me has to know what me is thinking. How? Reflection.

How am I feeling right now?
What am I thinking right now?
How’s my motivation level this time of day?
Do I actually like this sandwich I’m eating?
Who makes me happiest to work with? Who doesn’t? And where does that work best get done?
How does this action affect my goal?
How would this make that person feel?
Is this a priority? Is this really necessary to get done right now?
What will accomplishing this do for my businesses? My relationships? My happiness?
What’s more important, finishing this email or sitting down on the couch with my husband who just asked me to join him?

Eyes wide open. Quietness. Reflection.

Clarity.

I’m not sure I had the ability to place a finger on any of this two years ago. I was definitely more quick to judge, to react. I had less patience. I was louder, in the mind-mess sense of the word.

(Well hello, Monday morning, you’re getting a little deep on us today!)

I think I like it, though; all of this reflection. And I know I’m grateful for it. And I also know that all of it is true; it’s all part of this shocking and awe-inspiring journey I have been traveling the past two years.

One I continually hope I can help you travel, too.

It’s kind of cheating to create a blog post entirely out of someone else’s writing, but this one was too good to keep to myself.

Jonathan Fields, author, wellness entrepreneur, and speaker on such things as book marketing, embracing creativity, and easing fear and uncertainty in business, posted the excerpt below on his site at the end of October. I subscribe to his posts, received this one in my inbox when he published it, and loved it. Love love lurrved it. As in, I kept it in my inbox for – gasp! – several days, eventually printed it on actual papery paper, and it now resides stapled onto a page in my notebook.

I’m not exactly sure why I like it so much. Perhaps it’s because it makes me think about life, and how I hope that I am living and treating mine day to day. (Hope being the key word there.)

Maybe because it makes me smile. Or maybe I like that it makes a powerful impression with a simple, halfway-oxymoronic statement.

Did I just say oxymoronic? Sorry.

Perhaps I just liked the post so much because it made me think, period.

Anyway, here is Jonathan and his thoughts on planning your down time:

Scheduling Spontaneity

Scheduling spontaneity. It sounds counterintuitive.

But, the deeper you get into life, the more you’ve got going on, the more you need to schedule time to not have anything scheduled.

Ritual is important. So is routine. They help create certainty anchors in your day, moments where you know what’s coming next and you can get into a rhythm that allows creativity and productivity to flow.

But, without fail, the biggest ideas, the most endearing connections, the world-changing insights come not when you’re engaged in the process of trying to make them happen, but when you step away and give your mind a bit of space. When you let your brain breath.

That’s when data coalesces into genius. Conversations blossom into love. And the playful side of life swirls through you.

The busier you get, the more important it is for you to exalt and even schedule time to be unscheduled. To pause.

As John Lennon once shared-

“Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.”

Schedule spontaneity and plan to live.

To see the full post on Jonathan’s site, click here.

Pretty good, huh? Let me know what you think.

Go ahead. Be weird.

—

[If you can't see the video, click here.]

One of the messages most often heard in personal development is the classic, Think bigger!

Don’t limit yourself to this, think bigger!
Expand your vision for what’s possible, think bigger!
Think bigger think bigger think bigger!

But thinking bigger relies on something; it relies on the fact that you’re not going to change, you’re just going to be bigger. You’re not going to change directions, you’re just going to go faster and stronger in the current direction. Does that make sense?

So the question I want to ask is, when do we need to think beyond big? Should we be thinking beyond big more often?

Like, instead of thinking about budgeting our money to pay off debt, should we be thinking about generating additional streams of income? About building a business part-time? About creating residual income that has legacy potential?

Instead of thinking about cutting out some of our responsibilities to decrease stress, how about considering hiring an assistant or an intern or getting dedicated office space or launching a systemized business?

Instead of thinking about moving to a nicer neighborhood but one still nearby your location of work, what if you determined where to live pretending that work wasn’t an object? Would you want to live in that suburb? What about a farm in the country? Or a downtown condo? Or Paris, France?

Instead of thinking about writing more in your journal, how about contemplating free-lance writing and guest blogging and magazine publications? What about publishing?

When is thinking bigger not big enough?

Let’s challenge ourselves next time to not only step outside of the box but to step away from the box completely. To remove our blinders that we put in place because we’re moving in a certain direction. To open up our peripheral vision. Because if we did that, what could we come up with? What possibilities could emerge?

We might open up the a whole new way of thinking that’s not limited by what we already know.

You know?